Friday, December 19, 2008

Vote for Goat!

Well...

We didn't get into Ellen. Boo. It's a long story and part of a quest I've been on, and I'll tell you the story some time...but not today.

Today, I'm going to tell you about how I had the coolest pet EVER. His name was Copper, the Three-Legged Goat. He's my Friday Favorite.

In college, I got a little tired of the Provo college apartment scene for a while and I ended up in this great hundred year old rehabilitated farmhouse out in Lindon. There were a bunch of apple trees in the backyard and the owners leased their little corral behind it to some people who kept a couple of retired horses out to pasture. And that's where Copper lived.

Copper's story starts sadly but ends well. In his first life, he was a pack goat in the Grand Canyon. He was tall, with a lonnnnng face, brown fur, and crazy yellow eyes. His back came up to my waist, at least. His breed is sturdy and agile and can get down to the bottom of canyon floors better than even the most sure-footed horse.

On one of Copper's trips down the canyon, his leg somehow got caught in a rope and it was a long time before anyone noticed that he had lost circulation to his back leg. When his owner finally did, he felt awful and tried to keep Copper by the fire to help his leg warm up. But...

Well...the fire cooked it instead. So sad!

The owner felt really terrible then, and although Copper could no longer work as a pack goat, he didn't want to put him down completely. So Copper became a new resident of the pasture, free to roam, eat all the apples he wanted, and enjoy his retirement. He would try to hang out with the horses, but the old, wrinkled white one was mean and would snap and bite him. I watched this for a while, angry at the mean horses, and bummed that he didn't have any friends. Because Copper was a very sociable goat. He'd always hobble over to the fence to visitors, gladly stand still for petting, and other than occasionally getting loose and chewing on some of the yard shrubbery, he was obliging. So much so that if you said, "Poop, Copper!" he would do it, right on command. Rabbit style pellets that flew out of his bum. Merrily, even.

So we scavenged scrap lumber lying round in the pasture, built him a party shack, filled it with straw, and painted him a sign that said, "Copper's House."

Copper loved his new refuge. He'd hang out there, hustling out to great guests (and he had a growing following), and those stupid horses left him alone. Probably because they were ashamed that they couldn't perform when someone said, "Poop!" like Copper could.

And that's why Copper was a rockin' awesome goat.

15 comments:

LisAway said...

I've always wished for a goat that would poop on command. Now you've got me really jealous.

Cute story. Except for the pooping on command part. That's a little yucky. But I just mentioned it twice in my comment.

Shellie said...

was the horse trying to eat the goats cooked leg?

Annette Lyon said...

That's um . . . one talented (?) goat.

CaJoh said...

I feel bad for laughing when you said: "Well...the fire cooked it instead." I could just imagine someone coming by the fire saying… "Mmmm, that smells good what ya' cookin'"

You got my vote.

Kristina P. said...

Copper sounds delightful!

Debbie said...

Well, who wouldn't love a goat named Cooper? And I am upset about Ellen. Mostly because I was living through you - but upset for you too.

Nancy said...

Yea for copper! Have you seen the house since they added on, etc. Lots o' glitter too, but really fun historic details. H is a little crazy, but I love her.

Kimberly said...

Err?

Heather of the EO said...

seriously? The leg got cooked? NOOOO.

I wish my three year old would poop on command.

Annie Valentine said...

This makes me crave Mediterranean cuisine. Cooked goat, mmm...

Alison Wonderland said...

I'm with Kimberly, I'm unsure how to respond. I'm going to smile politely, if a little weirdly, and say really? That's nice.

3 Bay B Chicks said...

The owner cooked his leg? What? I think you might be glossing over a few key details here. How does something like this actually happen?

Like you said, though, Copper's life has a wonderful ending. I love that became a swingin' retiree in a party shack. Now if only he could find himself a good woman...er, I mean female goat. :)

-Francesca

Aubrey said...

That's funny...and sad. My mom had a blind pig when she was younger, which is sort of along those same lines. All the other pigs wouldn't let it eat, so she fed it apples from her hand so it wouldn't starve.

See... sad! No more crippled animal stories! (Although, I must say, the pooping on command was amusing.)

The Crash Test Dummy said...

I can't believe you got tired of the BYU-provo apt. scene.

Copper is a Rockin goat! He would have been more rockin had his name been Cooper. Sorry. Love that name.

Julie Wright said...

Copper the pooping goat. Hilarious. I have a dog named copper. She's a handful, but the kids are glad we've got her. I used to know a three legged dalamation dog named leonard. I loved leonard.