Tuesday, May 31, 2011


1. Can someone go check yesterday's post and tell me if Kalola is kidding or if I randomly just got chewed out by someone I've never heard from before?

2. I had an article run in the Deseret News and the Mormon Times yesterday. It's about online dating. It even features a quote from a blogger some of you will know. You can CLICK HERE to read it.

3. I just turned in a short story my editor requested for a Christmas anthology my publisher is compiling. I kept procrastinating it but once it was done, I loved it. I doubt they'll end up using mine because it includes the line, "Watching my mom die was killing my Christmas spirit." But really, I nailed exactly what I wanted to say, so maybe if they don't use it, it will appear as a blog post come holiday time.

4. I'm obese today. I might not be tomorrow. This is because according to my BMI, if I lose one pound then I'm "normal" but at this weight and higher I'm obese. I know I should probably be depressed by this but I honestly just find it funny, probably because I don't feel fat and I have lots of cute clothes I like to wear. Granted, a lot of them are skirts, but still. 

5. I don't like living in a place where there are snakes. Don't they know that we build suburbs for the strict purpose of denying that nature exists beyond our garderners' abilities to tame it? Hmpfh.


Kristina P. said...

Kalola has a tribute to Randy "Macho Man" Savage as her latest blog post. That says it all.

Loved the article! As someone who is married to a man I met online, I can attest to all of those. I may have to warn people, however, that he may someday have an affair with PS3 Batman, as he is currently doing while sitting next to me.

InkMom said...

Wait, I'm confused . . . Kalola, does this mean that the old ladies wearing elastic-waisted polyester pants with baggy embroidered sweatshirts and orthopedic shoes were wearing those same outfits 30 years ago?

And, I gotta say, your style NEEDS to evolve as you age. I don't expect to still be wearing stilettos and pencil skirts when I'm 70, but that doesn't mean I have to be the style equivalent of a barcalounger. My grandmother wore polyester pants, but she wore them with little strappy sandals and a peasant shirt, dressed up with gobs of costume jewelry and sassy clip-on earrings. So just love what you wear, and own it. The end.

Also, my BMI is one pound away from obese. Or not obese. Or obese. Or not obese.

And I got out of the lake yesterday when we spotted a snake swimming near the dock. I may not get in again this summer. Except my idiot husband broke his left foot, and tore the meniscus in his right knee, which means if my daughter wants to swim, it will have to be with me. Oh, the things we do.

Barbaloot said...

It's a good article---thanks for sharing.

I can't tell about Kalola. Is it chewing out or is it sarcasm?

Melinda said...

I think Kolala was serious. And an idiot. There I'll be the rude one.

Anyway, I loved your online dating article. So much so that I almost went and signed up but then I remembered I'm already married. :)

How does it go straight from normal to obese? Isn't there a husky, then a chubby, then an overweight somewhere in there first?

Andrew & Sarah Clawson said...

check her blog and you will see what kind of person she is.....

bon said...

The BMI index is a seriously flawed tool, baffles me why the medical community even bothers with it. Shapely Prose has put together a very interesting slide show illustrating the BMI using photos and stats of real people.

That said: this is the first time I have ever commented here, though I have lurked for a month or so.... so I hesitate to answer your question about my opinion of Kalola's intent. But ya did ask. Yes. I think she was giving you a gentle chewing out. I think you hit a nerve, sometimes happens when you mock others... even when YOU are only joking as you mock, it's a little less funny to those of us reading it while wearing sweater vests with autumn leaf applique running down the front.

bon said...

Crud... I forgot to add a link to the slideshow and my winking emoticon so you know I am joking.
here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/77367764@N00/sets/72157602199008819/detail/

and here:

Kalola said...

Kristina – So I have a tribute to Randy “Macho Man” Savage on my blog. I like professional wrestling. Lots of people do.

InkMom – I liked your comment “So just love what you wear, and own it.”

Barbaloot – I wasn’t necessarily “chewing out” nor was I trying to be sarcastic. It saddens me when younger women poke fun at “old ladies.” One of those “old ladies” could be your mother or grandmother. Most older, mature women dress for comfort.

Melinda – No, I am not an idiot. Why would you say that?

Andrew & amp; Sarah Clawson – Thank you for checking my blog. Exactly what “kind of person” am I?

And to Melanie – Next time you see an “old lady” wearing polyester pants and a t-shirt with embroidery, be thankful she is not wearing a pair of jeggings and a short top. Yikes!

Please feel free to leave a comment on my blog. I, too, appreciate increasing my comment count.


Kimberly said...

I am CRACKING UP over the commentary going on. Bwahahahah!

My grandma wears leopard print dresses, rhinestone earrings, and bright blue eye shadow. And she totally rocks it.

That said, there are outfits out there that cause me physical pain to look at and while I'm not fashionista (you've met me, you know), I live in DREAD of becoming what unsettles me now. Don't we all?

Awesome article on online dating. Love!

Becca said...

Hey, look. Blogger let me back on. I feel like I'm back at the cool kids' table. But I'm wearing old-lady shoes. I feel great about this. Because I paid a lot of dollars for them and they are Super Comfortable. But Dansko clugs = completely unsexy.

Also, I just read The List again. I love you. Remember that?

Kazzy said...

Gimme a break on the obesity thing. Those charts are reeeediclulous!

And I agree with InkMom on evlving style. Even when you change things with age, your personality can still show through.

Melinda said...

I said you're an idiot because you totally didn't get the meaning of her post. She said the coolest people she knew were old, she wasn't poking fun at anyone. If you can't get the humor in how some old people dress, than I don't know what else to say. If she had made fun of some of the younger trends would that have been offensive as well? Its her blog to talk about anything she wants, and she wasn't even being rude, just talking about something she worries about. Believe me there are a lot worse blogs around, if you want to find something offensive go read Dooce or whatever.

Sorry Melanie, I know you don't need anyone to defend you, I was mostly explaining myself, but whatever.

L.T. Elliot said...

I'm with InkMom about evolving styles. If not, we'd see a lot of older ladies wearing stirrup pants with baggy shirts (and those weird loop-back plastic things on said shirts) with big, big hair.

I loved your article, especially about being safe when you're out there and letting people know where you'll be. It's a dangerous world.

I really hope your story is accepted and if it isn't you have to promise to make it into a blog post. Or email me. =]

And as for living near snakes...*shudder* Indiana Jones knew what he was about.

Enjoy Birth said...

I enjoyed your article. We saw a rattlesnake crossing the trail on our hike this weekend. We all thought it was really cool. But I can understand why you wouldn't like them.

Sarah said...

Excellent article. I think everyone -- online dating or no -- could follow those guidelines.

Kalola probably meant that teens may look at you and see an "old" person -- so perhaps one of them is writing a post just like yours. Which is possible. But beside the point.

The Lovely One said...

I love reading the comments because somebody inevitably always says the snarky thing that I was thinking!

DeNae said...

Kristina may well have MARRIED a regular guy, but their "first time we met in person" story is the funniest thing I've heard in a long, long time. I mean, fall off your chair funny.

I didn't get the impression that Kalola meant anything by her comment. I'm living the dream she describes - having older kids who look at pix of me 20 years ago and then, well, fall off their chairs.

And I like Chico's. But I was born 40 and have been aging steadily ever since.

Can you tell I've been out of the loop and just spent the last 15 minutes getting caught up on your blog?

Carolyn V said...

Congrats on the article! That is so awesome. =D

Um...the whole Kalola thing has me perplexed. But I love her picture. (I know, that doesn't help at all...*sigh*)

NIKOL said...

I don't really think what Kalola said could be defined as chewing you out. And I think we can all agree that the younger generation is full of whippersnappers who need to get off my lawn.

I had one grandma who was a snappy dresser until the day she died. My other grandma embraced the sweatsuit. I thought they were both adorable. I don't think it matters.

LisAway said...

Good article. It almost makes me wish I could go back and try online dating. Oh wait, not it doesn't. Still, excellent overview and advice.

I want to read your Christmas story.