Thursday, February 26, 2009

Rules to live by

Stuff I tell myself before Cub Scouts:

-These are all special children of our Heavenly Father
-Some of them are extra special
-It's great you get this time with your son
-They'll be fine today. They really will.

Stuff I tell myself during Cub Scouts:

-It is wrong to hit children.
-It is wrong to shake children.
-It is wrong to drag them around by their pointy devil ears.
-Breathe.
-Count to ten.
-Try twenty.
-Maybe thirty will do the trick.
-Note to self for the future: It's probably going to take until at least a hundred.
-Breathe some more.
-It is wrong to hit children.
-Little boys are super gross.
-And really loud.
-It is wrong to hit children.

Stuff I say to myself after Cub Scouts:

-James is not so bad.
-In fact, he's really, really good.
-I for sure am not trading him for anyone else's nine-year-old.
-Even when he teaches his little brother to burp.
-If I forget this, don't miss next week's Cub Scout meeting.

22 comments:

LisAway said...

Poor Melanie. :) I do not envy you.

Kazzy said...

I am with you. I am the Webelos leader, and all it takes is one disobedient little guy and the whole group goes up in flames. And yes, I will keep my own kids, thank you very much.

Stephanie and Co. said...

You are a brave, brave soul. This is a good mantra "These are all special children of our H.F. It is wrong to hit children" I'll have to steal it if they ever put me in some primary calling.

DeNae said...

I was at Pack Meeting last night with my scout, who is nearly 14. Very little changes between where you are and where I am, except they aren't NEARLY as cute on my end. Scout math has always been "multiply bodies, divide brains."

There's a special place in heaven for dedicated scout leaders. And moms sure appreciate you!

Mina said...

My boy is 7, so I have not yet had the blessing of a scouting calling. I'm sure I will get nailed at some point. I don't look forward to it. But maybe I'll be able to use your helpful meditations to endure!

I had a mia maid who would constantly quote her mother (although the mia maid used a mocking tone) "Everyone has a mother who loves him." "It is wrong to hit children" would also add to that one. ;-)

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

I love you Melanie. You are a saint. Really.

Kristina P. said...

Wait, it's wrong to hit children? Crap, I knew I've been doing something wrong at work!!

Erin said...

My husband is the Cub Scout Master, and last night was the pack meeting. He admires all of the den leaders, because he knows what difficult work it is. You are a saint!

Becky said...

It IS wrong to hit children. But a little verbal intimidation might just do the trick...

Kimberly said...

I should be feeling pity for you but am too busy giggling.

Kimberly said...

Possibly because I'm Primary President...

Eowyn said...

~Snicker~

That would be such a tough job. Cuz I'd have my son and we get along about like sand paper and velvet. Oi!

Debbie said...

Did I accidentally go to your Cub Scout meeting a few years ago? Because I know I have thought these exact same things.

Emily said...

I DO NOT want this calling! Thanks for taking the bullet for the rest of us!

Sara@i.Sass said...

really? It is wrong to hit little beasts?
Now I would have thought someone was doing us all a favor by pulling their pointy little ears and giving them "the look of death"
oh wait we were talking about you not me.
Your self control is AMAZING.

CaJoh said...

Perhaps that is why my mother never let me be in cub scouts and had me wait until I could be in boy scouts instead.

Annette Lyon said...

I was a Cub Scout leader once, and it was about like that. I got through it by gritting my teeth and thinking that when my son was a Wolf, then I'd have this down and it would be so worth it to have him in the den.

I was never his leader.

cndymkr / jean said...

This is why my son is no longer a scout. I couldn't take it any more. Other peoples kids were bastards. Mine was, of course, perfect.

Heidi Ashworth said...

This is why I didn't want a second son. They burp. And chew loudly. But, really, the second one hasn't been nearly as bad as the first. Thank goodness!

Heather of the EO said...

Ugh...I so don't look forward to this. But I love that it makes you appreciate YOUR nine year old more. :)

That Girl in Brazil said...

So - are you able to convince yourself?!?!!?

If I ever get a Cub Scout calling I'm going inactive ...

charrette said...

Haha! I'm forwarding this to our den leader!