Monday, January 11, 2010

Dating again

I started dating again. I forgot how unnerving it is.

I remember the days of standing in front of my closet and staring blankly because I had to find one outfit that met all of these requirements:

     *Attractive without being trashy
     *projects confidence without cockiness
     *is easy to coordinate with my makeup

And of course, doesn't make me look TOO pregnant. I wasn't dealing with all of that the last time I was out playing the field.

And the make up thing is a whole different ball game. Do I go for bold glossy lips or play up the eyes instead? Or does playing up the eyes look like I'm ready for a night at a club instead of time spent in good conversation of the getting-to-know-you variety?

It's not that I forgot that dating is hard. I dated for WAY longer than most of you before getting married (at 32, natch). It's more that I just didn't think I'd be in this position ever again which was naive, I guess.

There are some differences, of course. I have a very supportive husband this time around and it helps to approach this as a tag team. It makes a difference on a first date with someone new.

Finding a new ward is hard, you know.

We went on our first blind date yesterday. It's tricky. We had to check people out without looking like we were checking them out. Not only did I have to be perfectly groomed, but I had to get the kids looking their best. That turned out to be the hardest part because James couldn't find his church pants and ended up in gray cargos that were two inches too short and looked odd with his shiny black church shoes.

Grant did okay for a while until the nursery came to get Kenny for a diaper emergency that was so bad, Grant ended up naked in the church parking lot (which I think is the wrong first date impression) and then returned in a back up outfit of surfer chic jeans and a t-shirt (which is still the wrong message on a first date).

Ultimately, I think we sparkled. The former RS president even hopped in our van after church and took us on a tour of her neighborhood and the houses for sale. And she's not even a real estate agent. She just liked us.

I guess we're lucky that our first date was so good, but we've got a few more to go on before we're ready to commit.

To a house, that is.

Wish us luck!

28 comments:

Carolyn V. said...

OOOhhhh, Good luck. It's always hard to make sure you love your ward. I am lucky to have such a good one. I hope it never dumps me. =)

Kristina P. said...

I'm a little tired of my mate, I wonder if we should start dating again too! Is that even allowed? Boo.

InkMom said...

Wow . . . I forget what it's like to live somewhere where your ward boundaries are smaller than Rhode Island. Good luck!

Chantele said...

Good luck! It's hard moving into a new ward. I've lived in my house almost 2 years, and STILL don't know very many people. It's a new ward though, and people are always moving in and out. Good luck!!:)

Susan said...

Have fun. We're in the same boat right now. I'll keep my fingers double crossed.

wonder woman said...

Good thinking with the finding a ward! Is just as important as the house, in my opinion. Truly your second home. And it is so nerve-wracking!

Dedee said...

ooooooo. Toughness!

Good luck with that!

DeNae said...

Oh, ward shopping. Ick! I know we shouldn't think in those terms, but when you have kids it's so important to find the right fit. I guess I've missed something; are you moving?

Duh.

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

House shopping is so fun. It's as exhausting as dating, too, but so awesome when you find the right one. :)

MommyJ said...

I can totally relate to the house shopping... to ward shopping? Not so much. I could move forty five minutes away and still be in the same ward boundaries.

Now, school districts? I can totally relate to that. I was adamant about m making sure our school situation was what I wanted before we built our current home.

Good luck with your hunting! Hope you find a house and ward that fits. :)

Are you moving far? Across town? Around the block? Across the state?

Alison Wonderland said...

So smart to ward shop before you house shop. You are a genius.

Chaka said...

Your new ward might even be more excited if you showed up as inactives with noisy kids and in casual dress. Just think how excited they'd be for you when you turned into the perfect family within a month.

Luisa Perkins said...

So funny! Best of luck to you; I know you'll find the right spot.

That Girl said...

I'd be much more likely to date you if one of your children was mismatched, naked or dirty.

Karen said...

I had the hardest time getting used to my new ward, but now I love it there.

Good luck with the search!

L.T. Elliot said...

Congratulations! A new house! I'm so happy for you!

The ward dating thing is hard. Sign a prenup. ;)

Kimberly said...

Nerve-wracking! I can't even imagine, considering the nearest ward to the North of us is an hour's drive, and the nearest to the South is more like three. Crazy.

Good luck with both the house and ward shopping - how exciting!

Erin said...

Unlike where you live, I could move to the next STREET over and be in a new ward. (FYI, I like living in the mission field more than I like living here.)

Good luck house hunting and ward hunting.

Lara said...

I'm not sure I ever thought of looking for a place to live by checking out the wards. You are so smart.

Of course, I had no choice, as the branch I'm in covers more area than Southern California. :)

Becca said...

AAAH! Ward shopping is so tricky. Aren't you grateful for that "yes" feeling, and even for that "no" feeling to know whether to move forward or turn and run? Good luck, sista.

The Boob Nazi said...

Wait, is this in Folsom or what?

Jami said...

We ward shopped before we bought our current house. It was a good idea. Good luck finding your perfect match.

Aubrey said...

You're moving?!?

Terresa said...

Ahh, the new person vibe that shimmers for those first weeks and months when you move.

Girl, I think you've got sparkle wherever you are and then some (just pass out some bloggy biz cards @ the next Enrichment night! :)

Best to you with your new adventure!!

nano*ink said...

happy house hunting...what a fun, frustrating thing.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

I hope your new ward fits you as much as you fit it.

CaJoh said...

Never thought of it that way. I always thought of it as house hunting. Calling it Dating makes it more like a commitment than a conquering.

Good luck with your future dates!

wendy said...

Finding a new house --whew, big job.
Finding a new ward ---priceless, or maybe not.
Making that good first impression is a serious undertaking.
I still haven't "gelled" with my new ward here.
But it is nice to feel wanted eh.